People will tell you “love takes time”, but if you plan on loving someone using your mind, then sure you will need a lot of it. But not to truly love that someone, but rather to give your mind enough time, so it could get used to that person, and if everything goes accordingly to your mind’s imagination that always skews reality, then it will make you feel like you truly love that someone. And this process usually takes time. But when it comes to real love, its never old, and it happens instantaneously. You can’t catch this moment and, as we said before, its not a process of some sort of a hard work, or time you put into it. That’s a relationship. And has nothing to do with true love.
There is another reason why listening to others is not a good idea. It won’t create “better you” (whatever that may be), but rather “another you”. You see, most of the time when people want to teach you something, they are very well prepared for any questions you may throw at them. They will make themselves bullet-proof to look like a true guru that always knows what he is talking about, up to the last detail. But most of the time there is that hidden truth; that second bottom; something that they are very much aware of, but still they are going to act like its nothing, because admitting that would destroy the core behind their ideology. But sooner or later you find that missing puzzle on your own, and your beliefs change radically. We all have experienced that when we were teenagers: something that we have strongly believed in, before some other piece of knowledge came along, and our initial belief fell apart. And then we started all over again, believing in some new, entirely different doctrine, taught by another “guru”. It happened over and over again, up to the point that more times we have been wrong than right. Some people say that’s just a domain of growing up. But the same thing happens when we are older; its just more sophisticated, and our internal transition from one version of ourselves to another happens more smoothly, not as intense and as visual as it did when we were teenagers. It touches us, our friends and families. It happens with our views on religion, politics or economics, with our sexual preferences any many other values that we so strongly believe in, including love.