Everything you need to know about true love, part 16

So how to hear that voice in your heart?”, you may ask. Well, your heart is always ready to start connecting with you all over again. It’s your mind that stands between the two of you. And you know it. Deep inside you can feel that your heart wants to talk with you. But after all those years of the noise that come from your mind, you feel shame to look back straight into your heart’s eyes (pardon this rather strange expression). That’s why you constantly long for those never-ending moments of action, happening in your life. That’s why you constantly need to see your friends, be in loud places, travel, hear music, watch TV, talk over the phone, be entertained in every moment of your life, so that you can push your heart away and won’t hear it calling anymore. You know perfectly well what happens when you find yourself without your friends and family, without TV, music, newspapers and magazines, without your cellphone, in a totally silent place. Without all that noise that you got used to, your mind starts literally cooking itself! It lost all those external impulses and now it feels alone without them. Right then your heart kicks in and starts talking to you, again, louder and louder. And you start listening, quietly, like in a trance, with a sad face and with your sight stuck in one place. You quickly find yourself in this state of incredibly deep and pure sadness. Yep, that’s because your mind got into a very uncomfortable zone. That’s how it feels when your heart starts talking again. It feels good, but kind of sad at the same time, like you haven’t felt this way for a long time. Its your heart! And its alive!

But then you quickly catch up with all the so-called “reality”, and your heart gets over-shouted by your mind again. Your mind is back to its comfort zone. Its noisy and your friends call and text you again, and you get back to your social website and got your music turned on. And you like it. It feels safe. It feels “normal”. And it seems to be happening to most of us. Even those highly focused on what’s happening behind the curtains of a working brain seem to act the wrong way. Instead of waking up their hearts and letting them to speak louder, they just ignore that voice and look into the deepest corners of a human brain to study what’s in there. And that knowledge makes them feel good. It answers all those questions about love, or at least their mind makes them believe so.

It is obvious that a reason why you don’t want to come close to your heart is because it would require spending a lot of time in solitude. You would literally have to cut yourself off from everything that keeps your mind occupied and, as a result, keeps your heart away. And we all are addicted to life’s noise and scared of being alone, if we don’t play this game of life by all the commonly known rules. We are so scared of being lonesome, even though we came to this world alone, and we will die alone. During the birth, we were violently removed from a quiet and secure place we’ve all known as “home” from the days we were smaller than a speck of dust, and no one was there beside us to share our pain. Similarly, when we die, we will cross that nonphysical tunnel of light on our own, with noone besides us, even if our entire family will gather around to hold our hands. But that loneliness is a very pure and beautiful thing, even though to the most of us, its just not our lives’ destiny, since by living in a physical world we can experience more throughout a teamwork.

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Everything you need to know about true love, part 15

You still have a strong heart beating in your chest, that’s for sure. A heart that connects you with this higher energy, called “true love”. Even quieted down, it will never stop whispering to you. It will keep waiting for you patiently, until the day you stop listening to your mind, or die and be reborn again. And you are not alone. Most of us have unintentionally locked our hearts and put the mind on guard. But there are still some beautiful things out there that we have never taught about, and when experienced, our heart starts calling out loud again.

Take children that we already talked about, for example. How much joy to your heart they are, when you see them interacting with this world so passionately, while learning and discovering it… or when you quietly watch a sunset on the beach (there is something mystical in that sunset; such a breathtaking moment!). Or when you smell flowers that just bloomed, or freshly cut grass; or feel the ocean breeze on your face with your eyes tightly closed. Those moments never needed to be explained to you, and no one had to teach you about what you see, because it is far beyond seeing; its truly your personal experience that happens inside your heart, and nowhere else. People can use thousands of words in a million of possible combinations, but still all they going to do is describe beautifulness. They will never create beauty, no matter how sophisticated and touchy their words become. Similarly, we don’t know love. We just know words that try to describe it. God, for example. Just how many books filled in with words, pretending to be powerful have been written over the centuries, trying to explain His almighty power and unique fairness of judgment. Look at me; even I try to use the words that will describe Him in some sort of a higher dimension that you and I could ever perceive. But the truth is that every possible word that a human language can come up with only can strip Him down from His real power, and even at its best only can become an insult. Our small brain (no matter how big you think it is) could never truly grasp a God’s power, or understand it, not to mention explain it in human words, no matter how excited, touched or exalted that brain is. If I personally could say one thing here and not insult God too much, it would be that the real God (not the one described by the priest at your Church, or by the words in the Bible, or in all other books), the real undescribed God comes to you through your heart, not your brain. You don’t have to know a single word about God to have your heart filled in with Him. You don’t need to spend days, months or years on a bench in a Church, or some cold and solitude place far from modern civilization, learning about Him, because this trick will only help you to create your own, personal God, living inside your mind. But we diverted from the subject…

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Everything you need to know about true love, part 14

So those are the things that people will tell you about love. They will tell you that you need to listen to them, instead of yourself, because they know better. They will come up with the most logical explanation behind all the feelings that you call “love”.

But what it really means to “listen to yourself?” When it comes to real love, you cannot listen to your mind, because everything there is just a raw knowledge, learnt from other people. And no matter how simple or how complex that knowledge is, it can only come from a hard working mind.

I wish I could say: “don’t ever let anyone to ‘teach you’ how to love”, but its too late! Sadly, we are literally a sum of all the things that we have learnt about love and life from all other people, and unfortunately we live our life second-hand, because others have taught us how to love. And that’s why we don’t listen to our hearts anymore.

But that doesn’t mean our hearts are dead; or “broken”, like some say. Or when someone says: “you don’t have a heart”. We all do have hearts. And you cannot kill your heart. Your mind can numb it and hush it, so you won’t hear it anymore. And then love will become so-called “crystal clear”, because your brain will use a variety of mind-boggling tricks to convince you that what you feel is indeed a genuine love.

So by now you probably see what I’m doing here: I’m trying to defend love from placing it inside your mind, simply because it is not the right place for it. Nothing good can come out of it, and nothing ever did.

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Everything you need to know about true love, part 13

People will tell you “love takes time”, but if you plan on loving someone using your mind, then sure you will need a lot of it. But not to truly love that someone, but rather to give your mind enough time, so it could get used to that person, and if everything goes accordingly to your mind’s imagination that always skews reality, then it will make you feel like you truly love that someone. And this process usually takes time. But when it comes to real love, its never old, and it happens instantaneously. You can’t catch this moment and, as we said before, its not a process of some sort of a hard work, or time you put into it. That’s a relationship. And has nothing to do with true love.

There is another reason why listening to others is not a good idea. It won’t create “better you” (whatever that may be), but rather “another you”. You see, most of the time when people want to teach you something, they are very well prepared for any questions you may throw at them. They will make themselves bullet-proof to look like a true guru that always knows what he is talking about, up to the last detail. But most of the time there is that hidden truth; that second bottom; something that they are very much aware of, but still they are going to act like its nothing, because admitting that would destroy the core behind their ideology. But sooner or later you find that missing puzzle on your own, and your beliefs change radically. We all have experienced that when we were teenagers: something that we have strongly believed in, before some other piece of knowledge came along, and our initial belief fell apart. And then we started all over again, believing in some new, entirely different doctrine, taught by another “guru”. It happened over and over again, up to the point that more times we have been wrong than right. Some people say that’s just a domain of growing up. But the same thing happens when we are older; its just more sophisticated, and our internal transition from one version of ourselves to another happens more smoothly, not as intense and as visual as it did when we were teenagers. It touches us, our friends and families. It happens with our views on religion, politics or economics, with our sexual preferences any many other values that we so strongly believe in, including love.

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Everything you need to know about true love, part 12

If you compare a heart to any organ within your body, it will be rather like your eyes or ears. They are both receivers: eyes receive surroundings as a motion picture and ears receive the waves of sound and then its all being delivered to and processed by your mind. Your heart was designed similar way; to receive waves, but waves of energy we humans call “love”, and its precisely tuned into those waves. Just like your eyes or ears, the heart cannot learn knowledge or store memories. The real love is always happening right here, right now, and because memory cannot touch it, and because of that cannot seal it inside some sort of an envelope of time, then simply the rules of time do not apply to love. That’s why real love that does not come from within your mind can least forever.

So if you want to truly love someone, first you have to accept the fact that we don’t know how to love. And we never will. And that’s fine! Actually; it doesn’t matter, because just like your heart was not designed to store memories and “know something” the same way your brain wasn’t designed to love. It can only imitate what it thinks love could, or should look like. And with its hardwired nature of being competitive and hostile towards others, and with its selfish goals of trying to survive as long as possible at any cost, your brain cannot succeed in truly loving another humanbeing. It cannot come anywhere close to understanding that vivid energy that came far far away from a deep universe. It can only mimic it, sometimes very persuadably, but even then only to a certain degree, after which it will miserably fail.

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Everything you need to know about true love, part 11

People will always have something to say about love. They will tell you: “if you really want to love, you need to teach your heart this or that”. But in reality, you cannot teach your heart anything.

I think we all have misconceptions when it comes to understanding our hearts. Let’s talk about your heart, for a moment.

What is your heart? Did you ever think about it? Do you believe you can teach your heart something? Love is the oldest energy in the universe; there is no reason to teach your heart about love. Your heart wasn’t even designed to learn or hold the knowledge. Think about it. To learn something means to obtain information and keep it somewhere (like in your memory), so every time you reach out, that knowledge is there, ready to serve you, to help you understand, or to inform you about something.

So when you see happy couples around, you think to yourself something like: “I need to watch them carefully and teach myself how to love. I need to work hard and develop those feelings, so that my heart can love. And then I will feel it”. So you treat your heart like its some sort of an empty chamber, waiting to be filled in; or a vacant building that is designated to become a library, full of books about love, written passionately by people from all around the world; some that did tremendous job describing their feelings in very smooth and clever way.

But it simply won’t work. Whatever you manage to teach yourself about love, it can only be kept in your memory. Don’t forget that the power of love comes from this energy that is always fresh, always new, always here and now; not yesterday, or a year ago, not even a minute ago, just right here, right now. The knowledge that your mind holds (just like you think your heart does) is always old, is always about yesterday, or a minute ago. Sure, you can teach yourself something new, but the moment that this new knowledge is shipped into your brain, it is already a matter of the past. And there is no such a thing like a new and fresh memory about “right now”. That’s why, for example – a memory of riding a roller coaster (even if you did it hundreds of times), no matter how exciting and vivid that thought is – cannot come anywhere close to a real event of a thrilled ride, happening right in this moment.

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Everything you need to know about true love, part 10

People will also say that “love hurts”. But you know love cannot be associated with pain. Every time pain shows up, true love fades away.

What it is, is that people let their mind to overtake the decision-making process and then it creates all those assumptions and expectations towards the quote-unquote “loved” one. And then when the difference between what’s real and what’s not kicks in, they find themselves unhappy and hurt. And then it is easy to blame love. But the moment you stop your mind from creating all those false expectations about your other half, you will let that person to be whomever she or he really is, with no filters applied. Then “love” won’t hurt anymore. And then, real love will come to the light.

So people talk and we listen. Have you ever noticed how hard it is to figure it out when people say things and they really mean them, and when they just try to cheer us up? Like they listen about your problems and say: “oh don’t worry; everything will be fine!” But how do they know? And so many times it turns out not to be fine after all. They watch your father being very sick and they hug you and tell you “he will be fine” and then shortly after he dies. And then they ran out of words, for a moment. This willingness to say whatever it is and sometimes against the reality only to cheer us up no matter what – is it really a sign of a good friend and someone who cares about you? I don’t know. But what I do know is that the only way for anyone to truly see you and understand you and to understand what love mean to you, is to be in your shoes. And that will never happen.

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment